motivation monday,  self-care,  self-compassion,  this-n-that

Roadblocks to Believing in Yourself

Make self-compassion a priority

Self-confidence boosts your chances of living the life you want to live. However, if you are too hard on yourself, you can short circuit your confidence and avoid moving out of your comfort zone to create a better life. You could even come to think you don’t deserve the life you want.

Practicing self-compassion is essential for a healthy, happy life.

Check out these three common confidence killers that can keep you from living out your true potential.

1. Comparison

Quit comparing your life to the lives of those around you and especially the lives of people you’re connected with on social media. Doing so can make you feel like everyone else is living the rich life while you struggle to keep the bills paid. Those Pinterest posts of beautiful homes have been carefully staged. No one actually lives like that.

Instagram posts tend to show all the beautiful things going on in people’s lives. Comparing your real life to someone’s Insta-life is a surefire way to make yourself feel like a failure.

When you’re on social media, you’re usually exposed to the best side of someone’s life. You rarely see the ugly parts. Keep this in mind and treat yourself gently. You are not obligated to live up to a carefully curated version of someone else’s life.

2. Past situations

Our pasts shape us and affects us far more than we realize. Negative situations in your past can make it hard for you to believe in yourself and be compassionate with yourself. Maybe you were in a toxic relationship, grew up with an alcoholic parent, or were bullied in middle school. These issues can create a mindset in which you feel unworthy of good things in your life.

Your past can be the biggest threat to your present if you don’t take action. It can sabotage your relationships, crush your confidence, and lead to self-criticism. If you’ve been in a bad situation in the past, you’ll need to re-train your thought process. You may want to work with a therapist to help you deal with painful situations from your past.

You can also download my free workbook on letting go of the past so you can move forward.

3. Current relationships

You may have heard the saying that you are the company you keep. If you hang out with people who talk down to you and treat you badly, you’ll internalize those negative thoughts about yourself.

It’s unfortunate, but sometimes the people closest to us can do the most damage to our self-confidence. Look out for people who make unkind remarks and then try to pass them off as jokes. Quit listening to people who discount your dreams and goals and discourage you from taking action on a project you are excited about. Some people may tell you outright that you don’t have what it takes to reach your goals.

Few things are more painful than a friend or loved one who is unkind and unsupportive. If possible, try to have a conversation with this person about their behavior. In a healthy relationship, there’s room on both sides for honesty. However, if they continue to treat you and your dreams negatively, it’s time to limit how often you interact with them. If you do have to be around this person for some reason, plan on some me-time later during which you can engage is some serious self-compassion.

Get this free report on Small Acts of Self-Care For a Happier Life.

Learn to be compassionate with yourself. Self-compassion helps you to shift your focus to your positive qualities, allowing you to boost your confidence and build the life you want to live.

Which road blocks are holding you back? Grab a copy of the bonus workbook to find out.